Freshly 17 and a new year begins,
Usually a new year comes with new resolutions and i have decided not to make any. Rather, i will live it one day at a time. I am 17 already but i feel so old. Its like as if i have seen through life when in fact i have not really seen it.
This is what happens when i get too caught up in the busyness of this life. It is good to be busy but when i start losing my sense of purpose, that is not good at all.
I become more short-tempered, cynical and just want to not do anything.
Purpose: To be a more loving and caring person, staying true to principles and to do everything to the best.
Last year was a year of exploration. New environment, friends and challenges. And that challenged me to broaden my horizions.
Sometimes i feel that i over think, to the point until i do not feel satisifed with my own life.
I cannot go past a day doing nothing or something meaningless.
And this thinking of mine at times led me to be cynical, especially when i feel that i am not doing something meaningful.
I set a high standard for myself. until i overthink.
I got to let go of some and be contented. For i am a human and not a superwoman.
The ironic thing is i set it but yet sometimes i do not work hard to acheive it.
Confusions within myself.
Deep down, i know i need quiet time with God. Knowing it and not doing it. I am not happy.