I am always more idealistic than realistic…
However sometimes being too idealistic is not good..
Especially when you cannot meet the targets when you set for yourself….
I am competitive…although i do not express it…but i am competitive
I contstantly challenged myself to be better….especially when i see my classmates doing exceedingly well
For the wrong purpose…that is
I kept saying that i am doing all this to glorfiy God..but not true..actually i am doing it to please myself..
Now i am in the midst of Prelims…
So far i am a bit disappointed with 2 papers especially after i put in so much effort
The first paper was biology…
I memorised everything i could and kept going through over and over again..
However the minute i turn over to the first question of my biology paper…i was shocked..
Most of the questions were experiment-based…It requires critical thinking…
At first my mind went totally blank but eventually i managed to compose myself to answer the questions..
Towards the end of the examination..i knew getting a distinction or even a B may be impossible..
I was disappointed with myself for i had set out to get a distinction for science…
The second paper was the one i took today..history paper 2
I memorised 2 main topics….mainly hitler, stalin and War in Europe
Both came out today…and i did war in Europe..
I could answer part a but not part b as i never came across that kind of question before..
In the end i wrote up a essay that makes no sense..but that the best answer i think i could give
I pray that my SBQ will bring up my SEQ…i will be most happy if i get a B..
Unexpected things like these two occured and the idealistic and competitive me usually cannot take it at first
But i know that reacting this way was somehow wrong..because God was not inside..i did not let him in
I am just basically trying to acheive my targets by myself..
I am going to cut down on my personal aims…turned it into God-centered…
Giving him the Glory for everything whether good or bad…
I wanna thank him for the papers i had been through..
Social studies, maths paper 1 and chinese was very well done..
I knew it would have been not possible without God…thanks!
I will be putting the effort for the remaining papers…and glorfiy Him!:)