Life journey

Every single day i woke up feeling happy and go to sleep thanking God.

I did not have any problems at all…..feeling very relaxed..

I know for sure that life is not a bed of roses and am trying to prepare myself mentally for the next challenge that i will face.

It seems that the best way to prepare myself is to go through it..and emerge  stronger.

Today my sister and auntie have a big quarrel…….i was not involved in it. Right after that my mum called… the wrong time…..cannot blame her. I picked up the phone and  my mum asked what happened as she sense something was wrong…..

I replied ‘nothing’ and then my auntie turned to me and said,’you send the message’ I was like huh? totally clueless..  then she came and said that i send a message telling to my mum about their argument.  My mum and auntie are on bad terms. I was totally shocked by her accusation…….then the argument started. It ended on a bad note.

I was very upset when she said things like ‘you cant expect people to think good things about you’  I reacted by questioning her judgement and even her character……i was wrong………

When she said hurtful things like that……i felt totally useless……

These past few months…..i have been behaving myself….trying not to get into trouble…help her whenever i can…..control my emotions…….and she just said it without a second thought.

She is one of the people in my life whom i look up to……

She may not know……..but i care about what she thinks about me….

No matter how many arguments she and i had in the past………i still care.

In the past i used to dislike her for her stubborn and rigid character….that is because i was immature.

But now i understand her more……..

With the addition of baby bro………i actually thought that all arguments would cease……but i was wrong

I fail this time around…….by reacting

I am going to improve myself again……..

I do not know how the next few days would go………but i leave it to God.

I want to celebrate my birthday with pure joy


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. aiping
    Dec 27, 2009 @ 10:06:26

    Hi Zoe,

    Thanks for your honest sharing. Do acknowledge that we cannot control other people's actions. We can only control our reactions. You'll need to train yourself to respond, and not react. Just pause for a moment before responding, and determine whether the incident will even matter one year from now. If it will not, then learn to let it go. It takes practice and help from the Holy Spirit to do this, but in time, you will be able to do it. I know you can. I'll pray along with you for you.
    God bless you and continue growing faithfully in the Lord.


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